Our First Month of Nights: The 10 Things That Got Us to Morning
Two new parents, one small flat, a newborn who woke every three hours: one of those nights from first wake-up to morning, and what made each step shorter.
10 products8 min read
The night this story is about
Our daughter was eleven days old and we had stopped counting the wake-ups somewhere around night four. We live in a one-bedroom flat, so the bassinet was a metre from our bed and the changing mat was on top of a chest of drawers, and every sound either of us made was a sound she heard.
We had bought things in the usual panic before she came, most of which turned out to be clothes. What we actually used was a short list of small objects, and we worked out what belonged on it in the dark, one wake-up at a time.
This is one of those nights, more or less as it happened, with the things appearing at the moment we reached for them.
2 a.m. — the first wake-up
She started with a snuffle, then a grizzle, then the full siren. One of us was already sitting up. The other was feeling along the wall for a switch that would have lit the room like a petrol station and woken all three of us properly.
The light we could reach without looking
The touch-dimmable night light, about $10, lives on the floor by the bassinet, and a tap on the top brings it up to a warm glow that is enough to see a face by and not enough to make anyone squint. A second tap takes it lower; a long press turns it off. It charges over USB and runs for several nights between charges, which means there is no cable snaking across the floor for a tired person to find with a foot. It also has thirteen colour modes and a remote, neither of which you want; we set it to warm white in the first week and have not touched the remote since.
Touch Dimmable Night Light (USB, Remote)
$10.39
The sound that made the flat quieter
The USB rechargeable white noise machine, about $20, sits on the chest of drawers and plays a steady shush with a soft glow on its base. We had been sceptical. Then we noticed that the lift door down the hall, which had woken her twice on night three, stopped registering once the machine was on. It has a timer, so it can switch itself off after she is properly down, and it charges over USB. Its built-in light is brighter than you want at two in the morning; a strip of tape over half of it fixed that. Past a couple of metres it does nothing, so it needs to be near the bassinet rather than on a shelf across the room.
USB Rechargeable White Noise Machine (Timer)
$19.62
The muslin we wrapped her in
The six-layer cotton muslin swaddle blanket, about $16, is a large, soft gauze square that breathes and wraps snugly. At every resettle one of us would re-wrap her arms-in while the other held the light, and the muslin was the thing that made the wrap hold without being warm. It went in the wash more than anything else we owned that month. It shrinks a little on the first hot wash and is still big enough afterwards; follow the safe-sleep guidance you have been given on swaddling, and stop once she starts trying to roll.
6-Layer Cotton Muslin Swaddle Blanket
$16.08
She settled in about ten minutes. We lay back down. Twenty minutes later, a different noise told us the second part of the night had begun.
2.40 a.m. — the changing table
A newborn nappy change at three in the morning is a two-handed job performed by one person, because the other hand is keeping a small, surprisingly strong person from rolling off a chest of drawers. The question of where the old nappy goes is not trivial.
The bin that opened for us
The motion-sensor trash can with lid, about $18, stands beside the drawers and opens when you wave a hand over it. The nappy goes in, the lid closes itself a few seconds later, and the smell stays where it belongs, which in a one-bedroom flat matters more than we expected. It is a small bin, about a day and a half of newborn nappies before it needs emptying, and it runs on batteries, so keep spares; it will die on the one night you most need it.
Motion-Sensor Trash Can with Lid
$18.39
The mat that made every surface a changing table
The foldable waterproof changing pad with pockets, about $10, folds to the size of a paperback, has pockets for two nappies and a pack of wipes, and opens into a wipe-clean mat. At night it stayed open on the chest of drawers; in the daytime it turned the sofa, the car boot and a café bench into a changing table, and it is the one thing from this list that went everywhere with us. The padding is thin — it is a clean surface, not a cushion — and the wipes window on the front is more useful than it sounds at three in the morning.
Foldable Waterproof Changing Pad with Pockets
$10.29
Clean nappy, clean sleepsuit, back in the bassinet. This time she did not settle. She was hungry, and the next part of the night was the one we had worked hardest to get right.
4 a.m. — the feed
We were mixing feeds that month, and the bottle feeds at night were the part we had dreaded: the kitchen, the kettle, the wait, the cooling under a tap while someone screamed in the next room. We fixed it with a warmer that lives by the bed.
The warmer that stayed in the bedroom
The JUSTLANG portable bottle warmer, about $35, is a rechargeable sleeve with a collar that a standard bottle sits in, six temperature settings and a display. A bottle made up with cooled boiled water before we went to bed went into it when she stirred, and by the time the nappy was changed it was at feeding temperature. It did two warm-ups a night on one charge and the whole operation happened under the night light with nobody going anywhere. We tested every bottle on a wrist exactly as we did before we owned it, and you should check that your bottle shape fits the collar before you buy; wide-neck bottles need the right adapter.
JUSTLANG Portable Bottle Warmer (Rechargeable)
$35.19
The cloths on every shoulder
The Elinfant bamboo cotton muslin burp cloths, about $8 for five, are large, soft two-layer squares that go over a shoulder and catch whatever comes back up. Three live on the arm of the feeding chair and the rest cycle through the wash with the sleepsuits; five turned out to be exactly the number for one wash cycle. They are square rather than shaped, so they slide off a shoulder if you stand up fast, which at four in the morning you do not.
Elinfant Bamboo Cotton Muslin Burp Cloths (5-Pack)
$8.19
She finished the bottle at about twenty to five and went down heavily. We went down heavier. At seven the light came through the blind and the last part of the night, which is really the first part of the day, began.
7 a.m. — the morning
By morning there was a baby with a blocked nose, ten tiny fingernails that had somehow grown overnight, and a parent who wanted a coffee with both hands. The morning things are the least exciting in this story and we would buy all three again.
The nose-clearer for the five o’clock snuffle
The electric baby nasal aspirator, about $11, is a quiet rechargeable nose-clearer with three soft silicone tips and three suction levels. The first properly blocked nose at five in the morning is terrifying, because a newborn does not know how to breathe through her mouth, and this turned it into a two-minute job she objected to only mildly. Wash the tips after every use and expect the tube to be fiddly to dry. It is for the ordinary snuffle; if you are worried about breathing, you call someone, you do not reach for a gadget.
Electric Baby Nasal Aspirator (Rechargeable)
$10.92
The trimmer that did not frighten us
The electric nail trimmer with LED light, about $11, has a soft spinning file behind a plastic guard instead of a blade, and a small light so you can see what you are doing. Newborn fingernails are paper-thin and grow absurdly fast, and the first time we tried adult clippers on them one of us had to leave the room. The trimmer files rather than cuts, so it cannot nick skin. On the lowest speed with the finest head it takes a few minutes to do both hands on a sleeping baby, and we did it during the morning feed, which became a small ritual.
Electric Nail Trimmer with LED Light (Baby and Adult)
$10.89
The carrier that gave us our hands back
The 4-in-1 ergonomic baby carrier, about $18, is a soft structured carrier that goes on in a minute and has a position for a newborn. She would only sleep upright in the mornings that month, and the carrier is what let one of us make a coffee, answer the door and walk round the block while she slept against a chest. Check the minimum weight for the newborn position on the one you order, adjust the straps before the baby is in it, and keep her face clear and high enough to kiss; those are the rules for any carrier and they matter more with an inexpensive one.
4-in-1 Ergonomic Baby Carrier (Newborn Insert)
$18.12
By eight she was asleep on one of us and the other was drinking coffee over the sink, counting the hours until the next night and feeling, for the first time, that we knew roughly how it would go.
What we’d leave at home
Everything in this story
Touch Dimmable Night Light (USB, Remote)
$10.39
USB Rechargeable White Noise Machine (Timer)
$19.62
6-Layer Cotton Muslin Swaddle Blanket
$16.08
Motion-Sensor Trash Can with Lid
$18.39
Foldable Waterproof Changing Pad with Pockets
$10.29
JUSTLANG Portable Bottle Warmer (Rechargeable)
$35.19
Elinfant Bamboo Cotton Muslin Burp Cloths (5-Pack)
$8.19
Electric Baby Nasal Aspirator (Rechargeable)
$10.92
Electric Nail Trimmer with LED Light (Baby and Adult)
$10.89
4-in-1 Ergonomic Baby Carrier (Newborn Insert)
$18.12
Everything here comes to about $158. Prices in USD; they move a little from week to week.
Frequently asked questions
What do I actually need for the night feeds with a newborn?
Four things: a low light you can switch on without waking anyone, steady sound to cover the house, somewhere to put the nappy with one hand, and a way to warm a bottle without walking to the kitchen. Everything else in this story is comfort. Our full set came to about $158; those four alone were about $83.
Is cheap baby gear safe enough to use?
For most of what is in this story, yes, because a lamp, a sound machine, a bin and a muslin do not hold the baby up or go in the baby's mouth. We were more careful with the bottle warmer and the carrier: we tested the warmer's temperature on a wrist every time, and we checked the carrier's minimum weight and the newborn position before using it.
Do I need a white noise machine for a newborn?
You need something steady and quiet enough to cover a flat's noises, and a phone app works if you don't mind the phone living in the bedroom. We bought a small rechargeable machine with a timer for about $20 because we wanted our phones back, and it earned its place in the first week.
How do you warm a bottle at 4 a.m. without going to the kitchen?
A rechargeable bottle warmer that lives by the bed. Ours brought a bottle made up with cooled boiled water to feeding temperature in the time it took to change a nappy, and did two feeds a night on one charge. Follow your formula's preparation guidance; the warmer only removes the walk and the wait.
How far ahead should I order?
Three weeks before the due date. Most of this gear ships from overseas and takes one to three weeks to arrive, and you want a day to charge the lamp, the sound machine and the warmer and run them through a test night before you rely on them.